Valentine’s Day 2017

Valentine’s Day 2017

Valentine’s Day 2017 is fast approaching so you better start planning. This year you’re going to skip the easy to buy gifts and wow her instead with something a little more meaningful and thoughtful. We’ve got two ideas that don’t cost any money at all, but are more sentimental in nature.

Idea One:

Your Wedding Vows- remember those things? This was the contract of love and commitment you had pledged to one another in front of your closest friends and family. Go find those vows and make a little handwritten keepsake to put on your night stand. Think nice paper and penmanship in a beautiful frame. After the kids go to sleep make sure to bring this gift to her and say this year you want to reflect together on how your doing as a married couple. What in your marital contract are you doing well with and what are some areas you could maybe improve upon (you’re a pretty amazing hubby so not much to improve on). She may love the sentimental nature of this gift and the emotional connection you’re making when talking about how you two are measuring up against your wedding vows.

Idea Two:

Serenade Her- think either the song you two danced to together at your reception or her new favorite love song. Make it meaningful. Are you going to sing acapella or with musical accompaniment? PRACTICE! You don’t have to be a great vocalist, but make sure you put worth effort rehearsing this. Forgetting the words halfway through is no bueno! Now think of the location- if she is more of a private person, go ahead and sing to her at home. Just make sure it’s in a nice and tidy area of the home. If she loves public displays of affection, maybe go for a shopping mall or botanical garden type of venue. Lastly, be confident. Confidence is sexy!!!

Hopefully these ideas will help you plan ahead on ways to keep your love life interesting and romantic this Valentine’s Day.

Let us know which option you went with and how your lady responded in the comments section!

How to Trim Your Bush

How to Trim Your Bush

How to Trim Your Bush: Some things to ponder and some products we love for trimming our bush. Personal Trimmers and Waxing Kits 101.


You look down below and realize you’ve really neglected your bush- it’s crazy overgrown. It hasn’t had much attention lately and has really gotten out of hand. The first step is acknowledgment and the second step is to make a plan to trim this way back …

There are a couple of right ways to clean up this bush and a better time of the year to really trim it bare. 

Winter Months: Let this thing just take it’s natural shape. This is 70s style and the Europeans do it all the time, you remind yourself.

Spring: Grab a pair of these lady bush trimmers and find a comfortable location to begin your maintenance work. Next, decide how much you want to take off. Do you want to just give it a little shape around the edges? Maybe you’re feeling more daring today and want to remove the entire overgrown shrub? No, you decide. Save that one for when you go on vacation this summer.  You’ve got real landscaping skills and have an extra 5 minutes to yourself in the bathroom. You decide to trim your bush back but leave your hubby’s initials etched into it! He’ll love it you think to yourself!?!

Summer: You’re on trend so the Brazilian is the way to go. You agree to wax your crack if your hubby does his two. You buy your at home Brazilian waxing kit here, give it a try and then decide to never try that one again at home. Ooops, the wax ended up in a spot it probably was never intended to go. After a very painful and embarrassing visit to the ER you vow to never, ever speak with your spouse again. Please DO NOT attempt this at home! Trust the waxing professionals, they get paid the big bucks for a reason to do this job.

Fall: Time to use those lady bush trimmers again. Just one last maintenance trim to keep its  shape for the season. Or on those cool fall nights when you’re feeling energized, you trim the shrub back so he can see the windows on the house again. This is his signal its time to go down, down there.

8 Ways to Have a Positive Body Image

8 Ways to Have a Positive Body Image

positive body image - social constructsThere are many stereotypes about women vs. men.  Typically I do not like to follow along with these stereotypes, but one that I have found to be true highly often is that women tend to struggle with maintaining a positive body image.  Many people say that this is due to several reasons:

  • Images in the media of celebrities and models
  • “Fat shaming” and other bullying
  • Stereotypical norms and dimensions of what beautiful women should look like
  • Pornography

As a Christian myself, my personal belief is that these reasons above are all just tools of the evil one intended for one purpose: to drag women down.  Women were intended to be the pinnacle of beauty.  The ultimate and final creation.  However, the devil loves to pervert and twist and destroy.  He attacks the very beauty that women were intended for, and he does it in our hearts and minds.

“Wait, you’re a Christian and you write about sexual topics?”  Yep.  Sex is also intended to be a beautiful thing that binds couples together.  The theme for the site is not “that Christian sex site” because we intend for this site and the content to be available and helpful to everyone.

So, because I would like to encourage positive body image for all readers, male and female alike, below I propose 8 ways to have a positive body image!

#1: Find your purpose

You aren’t here to just work, have kids, get Obamacare, grow old, get Medicare, and die.  Each person on the earth has unique skills and energy to be able to apply to things they are passionate about.  Do you have a passion?  Really, house mom with five kids who spends most of the day changing diapers after packing lunches and making sure the soccer car pool is scheduled.  Do you have not only an outlet, but also something you really enjoy?  Some goals you work toward?  What do you look forward to?  And it’s not allowed to just be “the weekend” so you don’t have to go to work.

You need to have an activity in your life that you daydream about.  A purpose that you Google search about while you have some free time.  Each person should have something they do that when they’re done they wish they weren’t done.  Some goals they meet and then move higher.  Some weekly activity that when you’re done and it’s time to go home you are already looking forward to next week.

If you do not have something like this in your life, and you can’t think of something you have done that inspires you like this… try something new.  Really.  Try kyaking.  Join a soccer league / volleyball league / softball league / ping pong team / book club / bridge (card game) club / nature society.  You don’t need to know how to do it or already be good at it or even know that you’ll like it.  Just try new things until you find one that works for you.

What does purpose have to do with positive body image?  Two things:

  1. If you think about your passionate activity regularly, you have a purpose for what you do that makes you feel good about yourself.  Sitting at home watching Netflix probably doesn’t give you that purpose.  How you see yourself begins in your heart, so you need to fill your heart with love.  And out of your heart, everything around you is affected – your speech, your actions, your motivations.
  2. If you have a passionate activity that you truly enjoy, you’ll realize that you are valuable beyond the daily grind.  That leads me to our second way to have a positive body image:

#2: Realize you are incredibly valued and valuable

Even in the lunch packing / diaper changing mundane things in life, there is value.  Again, we have a purpose here, and it’s more than you think.  We’re intended for more than average.  And there are people around you who love you and wouldn’t know what they would do without you.

So, this activity here goes beyond finding something you’re passionate about.  It’s about recognizing the relationships that are important to you.  We aren’t simply talented and energy filled for performing activities, but we’re also love-filled to be able to pour that love into others.  And in doing so, you’ll realize just how much value you have.

Task: Write down a list of three people.  Not less than three and not more than three.  Three people you think you can express amazing love to in some way, and they least expect it.  Totally out of the blue.  And when you think about that person, think about an amazing way that you can love on them.  Maybe it’s a simple email.  Maybe it’s asking them to coffee and asking them how they are doing.  Ask how you can support them or if they want to come over for dinner.  Pour your love into three specific people – completely out of the blue.

What does realizing value have to do with positive body image?

Again, your self image is going to come from your heart.  You’ll even hear people say it about others, but it comes out a little differently.  “She’s hot, like a 10, but she’s a total bitch, so that brings her down to a 6.”  When you pour love into others, you’re filled with more love yourself.

#3: Exercise to meet your positive body image goals

just workin on my fitnessThis is the no-brainer, but mandatory item to include on the list about positive body image.  Exercising does more than just help you achieve a certain look though.  It affects the very way you think.  When you exercise, you release endorphin’s, which are chemicals that make your mind and body feel good.  So even right after your first workout, you’ll already feel better about yourself.  Couple that feel good stew with a sense of accomplishment, and you’re on the way to a positive body image for the day.

Now, to extend the positive body image from just the day of your workout to long-term, you need to set some achievable goals.  And achieve them.  We won’t go into all of the ways to stickf to a workout schedule, but find what works for you and work it.  Make a plan / work a plan.

I myself have a ridiculously positive body self image because I go to the gym regularly and I track my workouts to see my improvements.  Track your workouts.  Not every little step you take, but track something measurable that you can refer to the next time you exercise.  Why?  You need visible achievements – back to the achievements idea from #1 above.  Say you go to the gym for the first time in… a decade.  Congratulations!  You mustered courage.  Now, get on that treadmill and see what you can do.  Don’t worry about the others in the gym.  There may be dudes in there who have been lifting consistently for two decades and check themselves out in the mirror.  Check them out and enjoy it, but don’t try to keep up if you’re not physically ready.  Just do what you can do.  And write it down.  Then tomorrow, get in there and do a little more.

6 months of “a little more” adds up to “a lot more” and “Damn, girl, you look great!”

#4: Eat just a little healthier

Again, the no-brainer.  Unless you absolutely need to lose 100 pounds for urgent health reasons though, don’t attempt a wholesale change in your diet.  Try a small tweek – rather than eating a bowl of cereal before going to bed, eat a salad.  Don’t do the fad diet that you read about in some celebrity magazine.  “I’m on an all kale diet.  Absolutely nothing but kale.”  Again, small changes over 6 months combined with exercise add up to big changes, which leads to a positive body image.  Also, specific small changes are easier to stick with.  “I’m no longer drinking pop or sweet tea.”

#5: Surround yourself with your own positive body image

positive body image - messages on mirrorpositive body image - no negatives allowedWhen you take a look in the mirror and see that your calves are looking pretty great, write yourself a note and stick it on the mirror.  When you have a good workout (again, referencing your last workout and seeing improvement) – write a little “great job!” in your workout journal.  When you get in the car and you turn on the radio, turn on that Beyonce album and sing to yourself, “I woke up like this! Flawless.”

When anyone says anything to you that you took to be detracting from your positive body image, don’t get mad.  Instead, throw some truth at them!  “Actually, I love my breasts just the way they are.” and if you need to illustrate to them what it feels like how they were just speaking to you, throw in a “if I were as overweight as you, I’d have big floppy boobs too!”  You know what I mean.  Any time there is anyone or anything tearing down that beautiful body of yours, just put up your “stop sign hand” and tell them to shove off because you’re beautiful.

You want to be surrounded constantly by words that speak into your heart that you are beautiful.  Because you are.

#6: Wear some cute clothes and strut your stuff (practice confidence)

Get it, girl!  Sometimes you just gotta give yourself little rewards that show off that beautiful body.  Maybe buy something that shows off your hard work to your handsome hubby.  When you are ready, feel confident in showing off.  Remember, confidence is practiced!  Put on the heals and the hot outfit and strut confidently for no other reason than to strut.  How awesome is that?

#7: Have wild and passionate sex with your spouse

Sexual Attraction: Get into it!If you’re married, there are few things that can help you build a positive body image than getting hot and heavy with your significant other.  People want to feel desired.  It’s in our nature.  Spice it up too!  There are many articles on this site around how to spice up your sex life with your spouse.  Maybe try a dildo if you’re both onboard with that?  Or an amazing clitoral vibrator?  Maybe try spanking your hubby!  Get creative and turn the sex tables!  Don’t just make spaghetti again for dinner.  Go for spicy Indian food tonight in the bedroom.

Passionate sex isn’t just about the feeling.  It’s about being desired.  When someone desires you in the most intimate way, and they express it to you with passionate pursuit, you feel your body is valued and desired, which builds a strong positive body image.

#8: Realize you’re already beautiful

you are beautifulEach one of us is already beautiful in our own way.  We care about others, we pursue things in our lives we’re interested in, and we try to be good people.  We also have amazing potential built within us that even we can’t imagine.  Our minds, hearts, and bodies all have hidden untapped potential just waiting to be found and realized.  For this fact alone – that we are amazing beings capable of so much – we should treasure ourselves.

Why Use a Butt Plug??

Why Use a Butt Plug??

This article is intended to introduce one type of sex toy that may significantly enhance your sex life: the butt plug. We realize this product needs a better name if it’s to appeal to women. Butt + Plug does not equate to romantic sexy time in my mind. The anus is not a flat tire that needs a plug in it! Unlike a tire losing air and in need of a plug, poop is supposed to flow out of the anus, not be kept in with a plug! The marketing and design are all wrong for this product. But we digress… So far on Women and Sexuality, we have steered clear of the butt.  Until now, we just had not found the right anal play resources, products, and guidance to provide.  However, as ladies and couples become more interested in expanding their sex live, providing guidance on the butt and how to safely use a butt plug and other anal products is important.

There is a clear interest in the anal region for legitimate reasons, so let’s explore the reasons from a nonjudgmental mind here.  The anus and other internal areas can provide a significant amount of sexual pleasure. The anus is an erogenous zone. For some reason your anus was designed with the functionality of sexual stimulation when explored carefully and with caution. However, you should not just jump right to having anal sex or you will likely never try it again (based on what we’ve heard).  You need to have some practice and do some preparation first and also determine if you even enjoy it. Let’s explore it responsibly and bring some spice to our sexual relationships.

A good way to practice is to first try out using a small butt plug (Did we mention we hate this description?).  Butt plugs will also help you understand whether or not you enjoy the feeling of anal stimulation.

How do I use a butt plug?

how to use a butt plug - pink plugBut what are butt plugs, who uses them, and why!?  The butt plug, as the name suggests is a sex toy that is inserted anally.  Both men and women use butt plugs alike! They come in a range of shapes and sizes but all should have a flared base or arms at the base to prevent the toy from being lost up the rectal passage.  Yes that can happen! Always be careful when using any anal equipment!

This sexual stimulation tool, once inserted, in and of itself won’t create much by the way of stimulation unless it is a vibrating butt plug. Vibrating butt plugs can deliver a thoroughly enjoyable stimulation.  This is true particularly for men because they massage their P-spots (the prostate gland) as they vibrate. For women, they place pressure against the back vaginal wall and so make the space in the vagina less expansive.  This can make vaginal penetration more pleasurable both for the woman and the man penetrating her as the vagina feels tighter. The real value of a butt plug is felt on climaxing as orgasming with a butt plug inserted heightens the strength of the orgasm.  For this reason, butt plugs can be enjoyed by men and women, solo or as a couple.


Why are butt plugs used? An illustrative video

Below is a great informational video that our friends at Carvaka Sex Toys produced.  It provides a good amount of information about what butt plugs are, why people use them, how to use a butt plug, and how they help heighten the sexual experience. It is also important to us here at Women and Sexuality that any images or video on the site do not have any graphic images. Thankfully, the video below only uses illustrations! Thanks again to Carvaka for producing the video. We hope you find it as interesting and helpful as we did!


If a poop covered plug is not something your significant other is interested in, please be cool with that.  He/She may have no desire for a close-up on his/her spouse’s anus and/or easily grossed out by bodily fluids. This sexual stimulation tool is not for everyone.

Remember, good relationships and a good sex life is about good communication and respecting each other’s boundaries.

What butt plug should I get?

Okay, we’re interested. What’s a good one for beginners? Here are a couple that we would recommend, from manufacturers we trust. Don’t just get the least expensive plug out there on Amazon!

Is Coconut Oil Safe for your Vagina?

Is coconut oil safe for your vagina?

We’ve heard many things about using coconut oil as lube over the last couple of years.  The coconut oil lube conversation really blew up when two threads it caught a lot of traction on Reddit  (this one and this one).  We’ve even written an article about why coconut oil is the best lube for both massage and sex.  But I wanted to write another article for those who wanted to explore specifically whether or not coconut oil is safe for your vagina.

coconut oil safe vagina 1Also, there is another purpose for this article.  It’s not good enough to know that coconut oil is safe for your vagina, but we should be excited about using it!  That’s why the latter section of this article will explore the advantages and wonderful possibilities of using coconut oil on a regular basis.

1. Is coconut oil safe?

For this question, I’ve decided to take a survey of all the literature available on the subject, plus augment it with personal experience.  For starters, I have used coconut oil on a regular basis for many things.  It is wonderful as a skin moisturizer.  Especially in the winter, my skin gets really dry.  I had been using several expensive lotions such as the thicker Eucerin variants and others.  They didn’t seem to be working all that well.  So I had heard that coconut oil was a great moisturizer, and decided to give it a try.  I would use it all over my body and then apply a smaller amount of the thicker lotion on top.  This really seemed to work wonders and I have never had an adverse reaction.

Also, my husband and I had started to use coconut oil as both massage oil and sex lube.  It’s amazing for both.  There are several products marketed as massage oils that mix several types of natural oils.  We have tried these also and not been impressed.  The simple coconut oil was better and much less expensive than all of these.  The ability to use the same thing for a wonderful massage and not have to switch to something else when starting to have sex is really wonderful.

2. What do the professionals say?

Unfortunately, there are no studies about coconut oil use on vaginas out there in the medical journals that are peer reviewed and published by professional researchers.  Apparently there’s just not as much money in sex product research for some reason.  So we need to resort to more anecdotal information from various sources:

  1. Huffingtom Post writer, Pamela Madsen, writes here that you should use coconut oil on a regular basis on your whole vulva.  After wiping when you go to the bathroom, use a bit of coconut oil to soften up and moisturize your outer and inner labia.  Wonderful advice here, Pamela!  I’ve started doing this and I have noticed a significant difference.  I used to have some dry areas where I wipe regularly, but since using it at least once daily – no more!
  2. Women’s Health quotes Jennifer Landa, M.D., Chief Medical Officer of BodyLogicMD as saying that coconut oil is great for your vagina, it can help with yeast infections, and it lasts longer than water-based lubes.  If you’re not allergic, go for it.  Just not with a latex condom.  The oil could make the condom more likely to break.
  3. SELF quoted two doctors here. First, “Lubricant can be medicinal, but it can also be pleasure-enhancing,” Alyssa Dweck, M.D., assistant clinical professor of obstetrics at Mount Sinai School of Medicine.  Also, “I’m a big fan of coconut oil as a lubricant for women,” says ob/gyn Sherry Ross, M.D.  “I probably recommend it more in menopausal women because it has staying power in the vagina, which is good for dryness.”
  4. From Natural News, “Coconut oil is the best oil to use if you opt to use one vaginally and it is actually a great way to treat yeast infections as it contains caprylic acid. Specifically, it has been shown to be quite effective in combating Candida strains.”  Most of this article is spent saying that if you’re going to use an oil lube, go with coconut oil, but otherwise they recommend water-based lubes such as Astroglide, which we also enjoy occasionally.  The issue with Astroglide is it’s not good for body massage and it is more expensive in larger amounts than coconut oil.
  5. From this post on, Dr. Raquel Dardik, Associate Professor Gynecology at NYU Langone Medical Center was quoted as saying that you should not use tea tree oil on your vagina because it does not have a neutral pH level, unlike coconut oil.  This isn’t a solid thumbs up for coconut oil, but it’s more of a “well if you’re going to use any type of oil, make sure it has a neutral pH.”

That’s all we’ll quote for now, but as you can see, the professionals so far are mostly on board as saying that coconut oil is safe for your vagina or even beneficial.  We haven’t found any actual evidence of any adverse affects.  All of the stories and testimony so far is that it is wonderful for your sexual health.

So Why use it?

coconut oil safe vagina 2Well, as we alluded to above, one key usage of coconut oil is as an external moisturizer for your whole vulva.  Rubbing it all around your inner and outer lips, clitoris, and surrounding areas is pretty wonderful.  It helps to moisturize your lady parts in a way that I would not ever trust a lotion.  Also, who doesn’t like to have a little mid-day self massage, even if it’s not intended to take to a climax?

We’ve already talked about the obvious uses where coconut oil helps with a great relaxing massage.  It can also be used for internal lubrication.  But have you considered coconut oil for a penis massage?  All of this conversation so far has been using coconut oil for your vagina.  It’s also wonderful and safe for massaging on a penis.  A dry “hand job” is one thing, but a lubricated penis massage takes it to a whole new level!

Finally, if you’re anticipating that you might get lucky later, doing a little pre-lubrication earlier in the day or on a consistent basis helps make sure you’re ready for the big event!

Which one should I buy?

Only buy the “virgin” or “extra virgin” coconut oil.  Do not buy the fractionated versions, even though these stay a liquid at room temperature.  The fractionated version is generally thought to be not as safe as the virgin.  Here are the two that we have purchased a few times from Amazon with no adverse effects.  I have been refilling the smaller bottles with the larger one.

Best Clitoral Vibrator: Our Top 5 Clit Vibrators!

What Clitoral Vibrator should I buy???

You’ve come to the right place.  Over the last few weeks we’ve gone on an adventure of trying to find the best clitoral vibrator on the market.  We didn’t try any of the cheapo vibrators you’ll find on Amazon because we have a minimum standard of quality.  We also only trust our lady parts (and yours!) to products that are guaranteed to not have any chemicals that may cause irritation or an allergic reaction.  However, that doesn’t mean we only reviewed expensive products!  In fact, our top clitoral vibrator is less than $50.  Interested in learning more?

Below we’ve provided a summary of the clitoral vibrators we reviewed. Eventually we will do detailed reviews for each.  With that, may we present…

The Overall Best Clitoral Vibrator: The We-Vibe Tango!

We-vibe Tango
The We-Vibe Tango has been our favorite clitoral vibrator for a long time.  Simply put, it’s just the most power-packed vibrator out there.  It puts the vibration to the max right where you want it.  Here are the things we love about the We-Vibe Tango:

It’s not crazy expensive!

Since when did we have to shell out $100 for a good time?  I don’t want to have to decide whether to have “legs squeezing together” orgasm that leaves my clit too sensitive to even wear underwear or whether I should buy groceries.  For the We-Vibe Tango though, if it came to that, I think I would eat package ramen for a week.  But the best thing here is that you can pick this up right around $50!  Really, in a market packed with expensive sex toys, this really stands out in terms of pleasure and value.

It’s the most powerful!

Let’s face it: sometimes you need to bring the speed.  You’re tired from the week and you just want to fall asleep after a quick 5-minute clitoral stimulation session.  Somehow We-Vibe managed to pack the most powerful clitoral vibrator into a small package that efficiently delivers right where you want it.

It’s dual-purpose!

The We-Vibe is actually a small insertable sex toy that packs a punch inside and out.  Even though this is a review focused on clitoral vibrators, an insertable vibrator won top prize.  Who knew that was possible?  We actually like that it has a longer handle because sometimes not having a hand in the way allows for some better penetration.


The Best Clitoral Vibrator for Stimulaton: The Womanizer Pro!

Womanizer Pro

The Womanizer Pro is a newer clitoral stimulator that we just had the great pleasure of experiencing for the first time.  It’s not technically a clitoral vibrator at all – it’s actually intended to be a sort of simulator for oral sex.  But there’s no oral sex that anyone has given that’s like what the Womanizer does!  This clitoral stimulator actually uses air to provide alternating pressure amounts to the clitoris, which causes an amazing feeling without anything actually pressing directly on the clitoris.  It’s pretty amazing and genius.  In a time where there are so many different types of vibrators on the market, this is a truly different approach.  It’s already being copied by other knock off’s.

It’s pretty expensive!

However, as you’ve probably already noticed, the Womanizer Pro is pretty expensive.  It used to be over $200, but since the Womanizer Pro40 came out at a lower price point with basically the same features, it put downward pressure on the price of the original Pro W400 model.  So even though it’s “only” around $124 at the time of this writing, it’s still about three times as expensive as the We-Vibe Tango.  The Womanizer is good.  But three times as good?  Probably not.

But it’s completely new!

If you already have a couple “normal” vibrators and want something new, the Womanizer Pro will add some excitement to your sex life!  It’s a brand new feeling, which doesn’t come along very often in sex!

Use some lube

Recommendation: This works SO much better if you have a little lube.  Try just a little coconut oil right on your clitoris and just move the head around slightly once you find your sweet spot.  You’ll have an unbelievable climax in no time!!!

Another Excellent option for a Clitoral Vibrator: The Womanizer Pro40!

Womanizer Pro40
The Womanizer Pro40 is essentially the same idea as the original Womanizer Pro W400.  It still has the same revolutionary stimulation technique, but the delivery method is different.  Previously I would have written that the Pro40 is significantly less expensive than the original.  However, as of this writing, they’re about the same price on Amazon.

Differences from the original

The Womanizer Pro40 is a nicer, smaller form than the original model.  I have small hands, so this fits very nicely in my hand and is more comfortable to use.  It also has 8 levels of power, whereas the original model only had 5.  I don’t really need the additional levels of power.  The max power of both models is about the same.  And the interface for the Pro40 changed from the power slider selector in the original model to a push button power-up and power-down.  The power-up and power-down works fine, but I wish I didn’t need to press it so many times to get it to the max!

Our Favorite Clitoral Vibrator for Multi-Use: The Lelo Mona 2!

Lelo Mona 2 G-Spot Vibrator
We LOVE our Lelo Mona 2. It’s one of our favorite g-spot vibrators.  It’s not our absolute favorite g-spot vibrator (that would be the Jimmyjane Form 6), but this one does a much better job in terms of also being an absolutely amazing clitoral vibrator.  The shape of the head isn’t completely round – it’s tapers down to more of a rounded point, which is perfect for placing right on the clitoris.  It’s also very powerful, though not as powerful as the We-Vibe Tango.  It’s also more than three times as expensive as the Tango.  However, it’s much better as an insertable g-spot vibrator than the Tango, I still consider it a great purchase.

The Clitoral Vibrator Dedicated your Clitoral Orgasm: The We-Vibe Touch!

wevibe touch
The last entry for this review is the We-Vibe Touch!  The Touch is the most traditional clitoral vibrator on this list.  It has a shape that easily fits in your hand and is contoured to your g-spot very well.  As normal, there are different power levels for the We-Vibe Touch, just like all other vibrators, but the vibration on this one feels significantly higher-quality than other clitoral vibrators.  It’s more of a rumbly vibe than most others, particularly bullet vibes.  The Touch feels more rumbly than the Tango, partially because the Tango is more of a mini-vibe.  It’s also pretty inexpensive – in the same ball park as the Tango.

So why isn’t the Touch at the top of the list then?

The We-Vibe Touch didn’t top the list here because it’s just not quite as powerful as the Tango.  The charging station is also kind of clunky and didn’t stay connected when I needed it to.  But if you’re not a power queen and you like more of that rumbly sensation that shakes the whole clitoris, go for the Touch.

So, what clitoral vibrator should I buy?

If you’re looking for a purely clitoral vibrator, go with the We-Vibe Tango.  The Tango is mind blowing power directed right at the nerve center of the clitoris for mind-blowing Nirvana that leaves you unable to move after you pry your legs apart.

If you’re looking for something completely new, already have a vibrator or five, and can afford to purchase something a little more expensive, go with the Womanizer.  Either model is fantastic and will leave all of your other sex toys in the drawer for a long time.

If you need just one sex toy to rule them all, go with the Lelo Mona 2.  It’s close to being as good of a clitoral vibrator as the We-Vibe Tango, and we have never needed more power to achieve a great orgasm.  It’s also the g-spot vibrator that will leave your vagina clenched around it asking for more until it can’t handle any more.  So the Mona 2 wins the multi-purpose award!

Hitachi Magic Wand Massager Review

Hitachi Magic Wand Massager Review

The Hitachi Magic Wand

Our hopes for the Hitachi Magic Wand were very high.  We had heard and read many great things about it, so we decided to buy one for ourselves and do a review on it.  You’ll see in this review that there are some amazing things about the Hitachi Magic Wand, and some things that didn’t stack up to our expectations.  Overall, it’s a great purchase and one that we wouldn’t change our minds about.  But it’s not for everyone.

Which Hitachi Magic Wand should I get?

If you’ve been looking for a Hitachi Magic Wand, there are a couple options out there on Amazon – the original, less expensive, plug-in model and the more expensive rechargeable model:

Being a professional sex health blogger, we decided to go with both the original and the rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand. A while back, Hitachi decided they did not want to be associated with what had become a wildly popular sex toy / personal massager, so they sold the rights to manufacture it to another company, Vibratex. All of the “Original” Hitachi Magic Wand massagers out there are not really made by Hitachi any longer unless you find one that’s about 20 years old.

Differences between the Original and the Rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand

In any case, there are some advantages of both models:

  • The rechargeable model is, of course, cordless.  The original model actually comes with a very short, permanently attached cord.  Use a small extension cord to extend the cord length.  The cord is also a minor distraction / nuisance as it’s draping across your partner’s body.
  • The rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand does have a cord for charging.  The rechargeable model doesn’t need to be fully charged to be used, unlike other vibrators.  If you run out of battery, you can still use it plugged in.  Though, the cord is still fairly short.
  • Several of the “original” Hitachi Magic Wand models come with a regular light dimmer switch.  This is because the controls on the original model do not provide a lot of variability in the power.  The dimmer switch essentially provides a reduction in the electric current flow to reduce the power.  From what we have noticed, though it’s a fairly janky solution, this may actually be an advantage for those who can’t even tolerate the lowest power setting on the rechargeable model.
  • The rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand has a different surface on the massager head.  The original model has a smoother plastic head that glides over the body more smoothly than the rechargeable model.  The rechargeable model switched to more of a texture that you would find on a normal high-end vibrator, which provides a little more friction.  However, that also means that it doesn’t glide very smoothly over non-lubricated skin, so you should plan on using a little lube if you would like to move it around.
  • The rechargeable Hitachi Magic Wand has a distracting bright blue LED light when it is turned on.  In a dark room, this light is rather blinding.  We covered it with dark tape.

So which one should I get?

So as you can tell, there are many differences between the two Hitachi Magic Wand models.  Based on the differences alone, we can’t tell which one we would recommend.  However, based on price, if you don’t mind the cord and the amateur solution of the light switch dimmer for power control, the original model is the one to go with.  Especially if you are rather sensitive in the clitoral area.  If you need some power and maneuverability, go with the rechargeable model.

Initial Impressions of the Hitachi Magic Wand

Despite the higher price point, this is not your typical luxury vibrator unboxing with a velvet carrying case and fancy packaging.  The Hitachi Magic Wand comes in a rather plain box with a picture of the vibrator on the outside as the main feature.  Who cares about the box though?  I certainly don’t.  The box and the instructions book immediately went in the garbage.  I care about how good the product is.

Hitachi Magic Wand Review - box


We immediately plugged it in to get a sense of the power that this thing was supposed to have.  Wow.  We have several vibrators.  This thing felt like comparing a jackhammer to a small kitchen coffee grinder.  It’s a little intimidating, even on the lowest setting.

But then we left it plugged in for a few hours to see if it still had that kind of power when running just on the battery.  It did.  When it’s fully charged, there’s no difference between it running on the battery or running while plugged in.

Hitachi Magic Wand Review - unboxing

Hitachi Magic Wand Review: Is it good in bed?

Packaging, initial impressions, style, etc. These are all fine for setting expectations and the mood. But how does the Hitachi Magic Wand actually feel? That’s the million dollar question.

Honestly, there are two issues with the Hitachi Magic Wand. First, it is simply too powerful for me, even on the lowest setting. Perhaps I’m blessed with a sensitive clitoris, but the rechargeable version is too strong. However, it is pretty nice to use with my favorite lube, some coconut oil, around the outside of the outer labia to help those vaginal muscles relax. This also helps to provide some buffer from the deep rumbly vibrations so that the power is not directly applied to the clitoris.  This is why some reviewers say that many ladies choose to use the Hitachi Magic Wand on top of their panties.

On the flip side, after getting properly warmed up and using the dimmer switch with the original model and setting it to the lowest setting, the sensation is pleasurable when applied around and directly on the clitoris.  The smoother texture of the head also allows the head to glide a little nicer as well.  However, we would definitely recommend getting warmed up first.

If you’re interested in this, this is the dimmer switch we purchased:

The other factor is that for us, the head shape of the Hitachi Magic Wand just wasn’t quite as nice as the shape of other vibrators such as the Lelo Mona 2. The smaller head allows you to pinpoint the vibration right to the sweet spot of the clitoris. However, some women also totally rave about the wand head shape because it’s able to provide stimulation to clitoris, inner and outer labia, and deep inside – all at once.

Bonus features of the Hitachi Magic Wand!

At the beginning of this review I said that we would still recommend purchasing the Hitachi Magic Wand, even though it’s not our favorite clit vibrator. It is still a great purchase because it is a wonderful full body massager! How about that. It’s original purpose is still its best strength. We have been really taking advantage of using coconut oil for massaging before sex. See 6 Reasons to use Coconut Oil as Lube AND Massage Oil. The Hitachi Magic Wand takes this to the next level. On the larger muscle groups, the deep vibrations are absolutely incredible. The Hitachi Magic Wand gives deep vibrations into your larger muscles that hands simply can’t replicate. 15 minutes of coconut oil and the deep vibrations will turn you into a limber relaxed sex machine ready to take on sexual adventures you have only dreamed of!

Hitachi Magic Wand - unboxed

Hitachi Magic Wand: Our Summary

Even though the Hitachi Magic Wand is not our favorite clitoral massager, it has many possibilities.  The actual massage capability has opened up new excitement in our sexual relationship.  There are also many attachments such as the ones in the link below that are exciting possibilities. One day we will purchase some of these attachments and write another review for them. Until then, consider if the Hitachi Magic Wand is the right vibrator for you! If you purchase one, let us know what you think!

Weekend Getaways- What Happened to Those?

Weekend Getaways- What Happened to Those?

It’s time to bring back those amazing weekend getaway trips! Gentleman do what you need to do to plan a long weekend away for just you and your spouse, but surprise her with it.

  • Call on the grandparents for help if you’ve got children in the home. Make sure you pick a long weekend that’ll work for them to stay with the kids.
  •  Make a reservation at one of the Sandals Resorts that’s now offering a Luxury Love Nest Suite. These suites often include a semiprivate pool and hot tub for two.
  • Pack the weekend getaway bag to include: magazines for the plane ride, that little black bikini she wore during your honeymoon when no one else was around, lingerie she might actually think about wearing again because her hubby has really put effort into this trip, and other cute outfit options for those romantic dinners you’ve got planned.
  • Don’t forget the plane tickers and passport (if necessary).
  • Balance relaxation, pool time and going out to explore a new local scene and cuisine.

Our Gift Guide for Her this Christmas

Our Gift Guide for Her this Christmas

Our Gift Guide for Your Her this Christmas

    • Personalized Christmas Ornament from Pottery Barn -$8.50  Add a favorite family photo memory from this past year. Small annual contribution like these really pay off over the long haul. The return on the investment is great 20 years from now when the kids have moved out.
    • Create an at Home Spa Package filled with items she’ll love and will use more than once, but will still leave you with money to fund the kids’ 529 plans.
      • Luxurious Bubble Bath -$38
      • Velour Bath Robe with Sherpa Trim– $90-130
      • Sleeping Mask- $40
    • Buy the New York Times Best Seller, Bad Feminist. $10. You know her favorite place for some intellectual stimulation is in the bathtub.

Tantus Uncut 1 Review: Our Favorite!

The Tantus Uncut 1 is our favorite dildo at Women and Sexuality! It’s made of the Tantus dual density O2 material that makes it very realistic.  The Uncut #1 is also our favorite for several other reasons though…

Tantus uncut 1 review

Perfect Size!

The Tantus Uncut 1 is a wonderful size. Frankly, it was just a little intimidating when first removing it from the packaging. But that is also what made it exciting! It’s not too intimidating. At 7.45 inches in length, this beauty will gently fill almost any lady very pleasantly. Also, at 1.75 inches in girth, it takes some warming up to get used to, but once you have the first inch in, the rest of it goes oh so smooth… You’ll feel yourself fill up with a wonderful, incredibly realistic fullness that will have your toes curling. This is about the largest in dildo size that we prefer and recommend to most ladies. You won’t be uncomfortable. Just be excited, make sure you have some good foreplay, and the Uncut #1 will bring you to an exciting orgasm, especially with some clitoral stimulation added in.


The Tantus Uncut 1 is shaped like an uncircumcised penis!  Really!  It’s pretty realistic looking, but frankly, it’s mostly a gimmick as the foreskin doesn’t retract like a real uncircumcised penis.   But, as far as dildos go, it’s the most realistic uncut penis that we’ve seen, so A for effort!  There is one attribute about this that is pretty cool though – some ladies don’t really enjoy the feeling of full withdrawl and insertion of a dildo because of the head “pop”, especially with a more rigid dildo.  You won’t have that problem with the Tantus Uncut 1.

The shape goes beyond the foreskin though – the Uncut has a gentle g spot stimulation curve that makes it incredibly pleasurable.  The top half inch of the dildo is mostly the soft outer layer, so it massages gently but firmly with no poking feeling against your vaginal wall.

Realistic in an exciting fantasy way!

Most guys won’t be able to match up to the Tantus Uncut 1.  At almost 7.5 inches long and 1.75 inches in girth, it is at the upper end of penis sizes without being classified as a “Large” dildo that would make most ladies uncomfortable.  But if you could have that well-endowed man with a great penis shape that filled you in just the right way, the Tantus Uncut 1 would be that dream penis.